Not only am I obsessed with reality television, I am obsessed with the end of civilization as we know it. Thanks primarily to the movie Red Dawn. The new National Geographic series Doomsday Preppers, on every Tuesday night, is the latest love of my life. It tells the stories of hundreds of people preparing for Armageddon. These people are referred to as "Doomsday Preppers". They are average joes, lawyers, retired mill workers and everything in between, all coming together for a common goal. From a polar shift to an economic meltdown, these preppers are ready for anything. Stockpiling food supplies, generating energy and establishing a line of defense to protect their family from scavengers, Preppers have every angle covered.
You may think these people are crazy, you may think they are all a bunch of Mr. Dobbs's all hopped up on conspiracy theory n shit but they're not. They are just like you and I except they will cut your fuckin throat out and feed it to their children if they hafto. And so will I, as soon as this season is over and I learn how to, that is....
Consider this a TwoBit Sports Public Service Announcement right here, because I care about each and every one of you assholes. Are you ready for Armageddon?
Well let me tell you, I sure as fuck am. I have been doin a little prepping myself. Things are getting a little crazy in my native country of Israel and I have began to take my own precautions in case the United States is thrown into a World War because of my people. You won't catch me beggin for anything when the shit hits the fan. You wont see me at all, actually. I've got my "BugOut" bags already packed and my BugOut shelter sits in secrecy, awaiting my arrival. Food supply, check. Medical supplies, check. Weapons, check. Mary Jane, check. Music, check. What else do I fuckin need? While you sons of bitches are suckin balls for a loaf of bread, I'll just be chillin in my BugOut shelter listening to Bob Marley eating Honey Combs ready to slit you freakin throat if you try to take what's mine.
I told y'all that I have been doin a little prepping myself, well here is proof. Between writing blogs, bangin broads and smokin hogs I have somehow found the time to prep myself for any typa bullshit that may go down. I've got a little bit of everything here so it's very likely I won't even make it to my BugOut shelter. People like me get killed in times like these.
I will kill you for your Sweedish fish. Are those Combos and Ramen Noodles? Watch your back Goddy, watch your back.
ReplyDeleteThey sure are bro. And if you look closley, thats also a 5 inch switchblade, bitch. Plus you wont even be able to find me so you dont scare me.
ReplyDeleteYour such a fag. A funny fag but still.....a fag.
ReplyDeleteSee I could watch this. Haven't yet but I am fascinated by paranoia and shit like that. Plus I love watching natural disaster shows n documentary stuff. We're already in a world war of sorts only difference is that we are causing it. When we start bombing Iran and Syria (in a month or two) China may finally say "that's it" because all the chinese and Russians etc. have to notice that we are bombing 6 countries. It's gonna go down just a matter of when
ReplyDeleteSuper fucking Volcanos
ReplyDeleteAsteroids n comets
ReplyDeleteA mutha Fuckin Supernova!!!
ReplyDeleteIf any of these things happen then all that preparation will have been a complete waste of time
ReplyDeleteMake fun all you want, but its better to be safe than sorry!!! So when shit does go down i have my pistols, assault rifles, shotguns, .22 rifle, and my high powered take a bitch out at a distance rifle. All of which i';m more than proficient with. Plus food water and many other essentials. I guess you guys can be serfs in my kingdom to earn you daily bread.
ReplyDeleteUhhh, whos joking? Can u see i have began my preporation? And for the record, id suck Bix Mix's butthole before id er be your "serf". Did you not see my 4 inch switchblade?
ReplyDelete