You can now find us at www.twobitsports.com

Its official. We have made the move to a diffrent site. The new website isnt anything special just yet but you can bet your bottom dollar that one day it will be. Your girlfriends will be wanting to suck my balls and you yourself will probly want ti fight me becuz your girlfriend wants to suck my balls. Anyways, we are doin the same shit over there that we were doin here, only better. So check us out buttholes. Its www.twobitsports.com. Peace.

Dont Call It A Comeback, Bitches...

After some time off and the proper motivation from some real(big fat) losers, we're back. Check out TwoBitSports.com Wed April,11th. Its gna be just a couple of bros on a less than stellar website, serving it to ya'll raw dawg like we do. Thats all we can promise. Theres no brilliance here, just an alternative to the everyday, run of the mill, cookie cutter bullshit life has to offer.....Television is a funny word.

I Remember When...The Seagulls had the greatest (and prettiest) uniforms in all of sportsdom

Remember the back-in-the-day Seattle Seahawk uniforms? The greatest sports uni ever? Huh? Do ya? From Steve Largent and Curt Warner to Brian Bozworth and Joey Galloway, the Seagulls were by far the classiest uniforms the NFL has ever produced and most likely the greatest uniforms ever in any sport, in any time, in any galaxy.

So, you may be asking yourself, "if those uni's were so great, why did they change them to the garbage pile pieces of crap that they wear today?" Great question. After more than ten years in the industrial waste blue that they are wearing, I can still not come up with even a half-assed answer. There is no defense for the change. Not then. Not now. Not ever. F@ck you, Seattle Seahawks management and especially, f@ck you to whosever idea it was to make the change.

There is plenty of precedent for the sacrifice of a great look in the NFL for trash. Just ask San Diego Charger fan (singular, as there aren't many) how they feel about the new (several decades old but still new) navy blue look versus the classic baby blue jerseys with the yellow lightening bolt and the player's number on the white helmet. No contest. And yet, the dull navy blue look survives. Best guess is the Chargers enjoy taunting their fans by lugging out the beautiful baby blues several times a year, causing nostalgia and joy (along with the required two jersey purchases by their fans) among the loyal few.

Fans in New England remember Pat the Patriot in much the same way. Bronco fans seem okay with the stupid high school looking garbage the Broncos now employ but this is most likely because the team won two Super Bowls in them after losing four in the far superior Orange Crush version. Ditto, the Vikings and Cardinals who traded class for modern high school looks.

The Tennessee Titans gave up not only a classic look after moving from Houston, but also dropped a classic name (the Oilers) for a generic one (the Titans). Their baby blue and red was sweet. The deeper sky blue with navy is lame. Add the Buffalo Bills to the list as well. Their OJ Simpson era blue jersey with red and white trimmed jerseys and white helmets with the stationary bison logo was rather ordinary but had class. The Jim Kelly era red helmets were a downgrade but the most recent change to navy blue was criminal.

So, it is clear that there have been plenty of bad changes, but have we seen any improvements? The current Bengals look is much better than their predecessors but could still be much better. The Lions and Eagles have tinkered by adding a variety of looks over the years without really improving or worsening. The Falcons switched from a red base to black but the change, much like the franchise, was hardly noticed. The Rams went from a blue and yellow look (why no white trim?) to a navy and gold that has pretty much split opinion down the middle, love it or hate it.

I am continuously thankful for the cornerstone franchises that refuse to screw with their own good fortune. Thank you Packers, Steelers, Brownies (they have messed around a bit but seem to always return to their classics), Cowboys (though they make me puke), Bears, Dolphins, Raiders, Chiefs and Saints. You guys are great. Don't change a thing. Please!

The only uniform change that I have seen in my three decades of couch sitting that I would say, without reservation was a brilliant improvement is the Tampa Bay Buccaneers. The Buccaneers terrible cream-sickle inspired orange and red-orange was bad. Their obviously gay pirate, with his whispy, flaming mustachio and his flaming orange fedora was far worse. The Bucs change was immediately rewarded by karma or the football gods with a Super Bowl championship and will therefore, hopefully, never be trifled with henceforth.

Tampa's change was really good but, if I wanted to go negative then I would say that it was simply a long overdue correction to a different kind of NFL trend, that being the even worse state of every expansion team since the team we started with, the Seattle Seagulls. Tampa, along with their state-mates, the Jacksonville Jaguars, the Carolina Panthers and the Houston Texans are all not simply horrific uniform and team color choices but also team names without the slighted hint of imagination or shame. Add in the aforementioned Titans and it is clear, the NFL has gotten too big and has made the unfortunate decision to throw all their imagination overboard to lighten the load.

Somewhere, the Seagulls classic Steve Largent era uniforms sit, untouched for over a decade. Those of us that loved those old Super Bowl-less years, yearn for their return. I will never stop hoping and I will never stop silently protesting their dismissal. Woe is me.

The zen master effect

 Okay this is a debate I've been wanting to have for a long time, seriously. How important is a coach in the NBA? How much credit does Phil Jackson deserve for all those championships? Could anyone have coached those MJ lead Bulls to 6 championships? Was it all Jordan with a lil Pip? How bout the Kobe/Shaq Lakers? Notice I put Kobe before Shaq and rightfully so. 

 So recently the the man has been mentioned for the Knicks coaching job. Rumor is the Knicks owner would be willing to pay whatever it takes to get Phil. If the rumor is of any truth he better be ready to spend. Most NBA insiders say it will take atleast if not more than what the Lakers paid him (around 12 mil per season) and that would be saying the coaching spot is very important. In my often bias opinion it would be worth every penny if they landed Phil Jackson. The Knicks have a bunch of talent, probably enough to win a championship. Of course I'm betting on Gaybron shrinking down to Labum status and choking again n again.

 I don't think there's a big difference in coaches when it comes to x's & o's but there are some factors that make a world of difference. Every coach in the league knows how to run different zone defenses etc. etc. And yes every coach in the league could probably run Phil Jackson's patented triangle offense. Some of the things that can be a big difference between coaches are things like time management, understanding the flow of the game, and situational adjustments (especially defensive). The funny thing is that I think Phil is average at best with all of these things. But he is the absolute best at some other things that probably cover up his performance in those. His understanding of his players and his obvious abilty to manage the massive ego of an NBA star is unmatched. He also knows exactly how criticize without alienating officials. So how important is an NBA coach? It doesn't matter who the hell coaches the team if you don't have the talent. But if you have the talent to win big, it matters a great deal.

 I really don't think Phil mattered all that much with the last 4 Bulls titles. I think his triangle offense was perfect for the players they had with Jordan but I think MJ would've won a few regardless of the offense they ran. I gotta give Phil some credit in the first 2 because his offense was fairly new and hadn't been studied much but we all know when it comes down to it, he had the greatest player ever!  I think alot of coaches could've won multiple rings with MJ.

 Now onto the Kobe/Shaq Lake Show. I give Phil alot of credit with all of those titles and especially with the two Kobe won WITHOUT SHAQ. Yes there are or were a few coaches that might have won it with that roster having Kobe and Shaq. The thing is I'm not sure they could've won 3. What Phil brought to L.A. was 6 rings of his own. They all bought in because of those championships. They knew they were gonna win titles when Phil arrived.

 Now with eleven fucking rings it's even more powerful. The players know The Zen Master only coaches dynastys so it's time to listen and buy in. Whether you think he is a great coach or not, whether he had much to do with any of those championships or not, he has something that no other coach on earth has. He has the ability to show those ego driven stars his eleven fucking rings. And with that this is one coach that makes a huge difference.

 Melo will respect Phil and with that roster they have the talent. No they don't have His Airness and they don't have The Black Mamba but Melo, Amare, Chandler & Lin is a really nice lineup. I would pay Phil whatever it takes and go get a title or three.

Song of the epoc

Let me start by giving props to this kid in the video, dude gets down! And whether you think he's good at dancing or not is irrelevant. You gotta love when someone just lets loose and goes with it. If you don't like it all I can say is, you are a square! He is seriously feeling this shit !

Now onto the band, Wolf Parade. I think they are one of the coolest sounding bands around these days. They got two different lead singers and use a wide variety of instruments. The fans are somewhat split on which singers voice they like better but they are both unique and different then anyone you've probably ever heard. They are now a pretty well known and respected band in the indy rock scene. Both lead singers have their own side projects going on. Both are pretty good but nothing compared to this band. They definitely have an original sound about them so I'm sure some people won't like them but those people probably listen to & like nickleback.

This is not my favorite song by them (though it's awesome) but they haven't produced alot of videos. Check out some of their stuff if you want to hear some truly original music. One song you should look up is called california dreamer.

True point gaurds are born not made

The Creighton Blue Jays came out last sunday knowing that John Hensen (Carolina PF) had an injured wrist and early in the game it was more than obvious to me that they were playing dirty. Smacking his wrist a couple times within minutes of the tip off. Late in the game with The Heels cruising to an easy victory,  the punk ass center for the dirty blue baby birdies gave a hard cheap foul to Kendall Marshall (Carolina's great, amazing, flawless PG) which fractured his wrist. Most analysts out there have changed their mind about The Heels title run but I wouldn't count them out just yet. There is no doubt they are a different team without Marshall being full strength but don't forget he still has one good wrist and it's his strong hand (shooting hand). I doubt he plays in the sweet 16 because they play The Ohio Bobcats but he will be back for the elite 8, bet! Marshall with one good hand is still the best PG in the tourney! This is true because Marshall doesn't play with size, speed, or strength. He is a true point gaurd that kills defenses with vision and instincts.  UNC will be there in the end with Marshall running shit, even if it is with one hand. True point gaurds are born not made n Marshall is as true as they come.

I'm So Sick of Punk Ass Pillow Fighters

Listen, you're talkin to one of the greatest Pillow Fighters ever to sleep over at any bros house. You just didn't want anything to do with me, especially on my home field. You see, I'm fuckin too quick for ya'll. I bunch my pillow all up in the bottom of the case like a cannon ball and BOOM! It's OVER! My shits a lethal weapon, quietly banned all throughout the Ohio Valley. So to me, this kids nothing but a poser. Nobody likes a poser and nobody likes a cry baby. Get the fuck up, bro! Turn those tears into fire and unleash hell on this dude, ZIPPERS OUT!! You ain't no Pillow Fighter, you're a damn Pillow Biter.

P.S. The kid with glasses would get jacked up. I would hafto go Zippers Out just because this kid is dumb enough to step into the Squared Family Room with his glasses on.